What is wrong with Spider-man these days? Himself.
Opinion column
By Luke Baker
Staff Writer, Secret Agent Man
“With great power comes great responsibility.” Those are the famous words of the late Uncle Ben — No, I’m not talking about the rice guy. They’re the words of our friendly neighborhood Spider-man’s legendary Benjamin Parker. Perhaps someone should remind Marvel of this saying, because it seems like they haven’t practiced what they preached all those years ago — specifically in today’s Spidey comics.
Peter Parker seems to have always gotten the shorter straw, snake eyes, the shitty end of the sti … okay, you get the picture. The latest catastrophe Marvel team threw at ole web head, in my honest opinion, is worse than the entire clone saga put together.
Let’s keep in mind here though, that I was probably part of a small percentage of people who actually enjoyed the clone saga. For those who can’t remember, this is where Spider-man was completely replaced by his clone — a clone who actually believed he was the real Spidey and the one we knew for so many years was the fake duplicate.
Image from http://gadgetscrunch.com/
Anyways, let’s flash forward to the present. Aunt May has been brought back to life, some mystical higher power erased Mary Jane and Peter Parker’s marriage from ever even taking place and Mr. Parker is now dating a some girl named Carlie. For the record, Carlie and Pete’s current relationship seems extremely one-dimensional.
Marvel Comics is basically pulling a George Lucas on us. It seems that Marvel feels like they can do whatever they want with their comics because they are their comics. I am all for surprises and curveballs to keep a story interesting, but what they are doing with Peter Parker’s life is downright unacceptable and a slap in the face to long-time and casual readers alike.
Aunt May was supposed to be dead way back in Amazing Spider-man #400. All it took was a couple angry letters. Viola! One cheesy storyline taking it all back coming right up! This is very similar to what happened with the butchering of Pete and Mary Jane’s marriage. Once again, a couple letters were probably written about how people wished Peter Parker had all his old problems back again with being broke and single again.
They’ve pretty much turned MJ into the biggest bitch in the world too. Saying in more or less words, she pretty much gave the excuse that she isn’t strong enough to handle Peter Parker’s life as Spider-man.
I almost wish Marvel just had them get divorced rather than say that the marriage never even happened. It was a major kick in the balls. For any female readers, we can just say Marvel kicked your ball-less crotches … just to keep it fair.
As you can tell, I am making an extremely huge deal about this. Spider-man has always been close to my heart. He has always been my favorite. He still is actually.
What? How could this be you ask? I’ve been bashing Parker’s world this whole time. I must be torn, right? Not exactly. I without a doubt love Spider-man in Marvel Comics today. The one I’m hating on is Peter Parker. I absolutely can’t stand all the unnecessary drama in ‘Peter fricken Parker’s’ life right now.
I notice that when I read Avengers and New Avengers, I look forward to Spider-man the most. I can certainly say I’m a lot more interested in Amazing Spider-man also when it focuses less on the man and more on the spider behind the man. It’s basically the one element of Spider-man that hasn’t been taken away from us — that lovable old goofball in a mask making wisecrack jokes and beating up bad guys.
It still really breaks my heart to see them screw up Spider-man’s other half, Peter Parker. It’s mainly because at one time Parker played such a huge part in Spider-man’s storytelling. It is quite unfortunate that Peter Parker has become the greatest weakness in his standalone titles today. Let’s hope some changes will be made in the near future to forget about the mediocre storytelling that hardcore fans have been enduring lately. Keep your fingers crossed true believers.
